You die.
You ascend to the pearly gates. Saint Peter stands there, or the Islamic equivalent, whatever, holding a book with your record. He flips through it.
“Let’s see. Beat his wife and kids, no problem. Stole massive amounts of money, okay. Generally racist, shouldn’t be an issue. Killed a man in cold blood. It was a Jew, so no great loss. Wait. You used pork paintballs? Are you fucking kidding me?”
A hole opens beneath you. You fall straight to hell.
“I can forgive the wifebeating, the drunkenness, the rape, but the pork paintballs‽ To the deepest pits with you! Insha’Allah, motherfucker!”
/j, obviously
One man’s religious stupidity is another man’s business opportunity.
Hindu paintballers be like
Yeah wait, can we not make paintballs with…no animal parts?
I know nothing about paintball, but I feel like there has to be vegan paintballs.
Marbles
Agar maybe, or alginate
Most vegans are to weak to play.
to weak
A joke so cheap it can’t even afford the second ‘o’.
Why use many ‘o’, when one ‘o’ do trick?
They can’t even climb mount everest!!1!
So you don’t need them to be hallal if you just don’t get hit.
It was just medieval food safety to not eat pork in hot countries. They really need to update their software.
It’s religion, not science. Unfortunately, logic isn’t a requirement.
The origin of Abrahamic dietary laws is not certain. There is no obvious benefit in terms of hygiene, also not in ancient times (they long predate “medieval” times). Keep in mind that poultry carries a significant risk of salmonella poisoning.
It has been suggested that the origin might have simply been that pigs are viewed as unclean due to their own diet including carrion. Another speculated reason is that rulers might have wanted to promote poultry due to it being a more economical way of raising livestock.
i have a specific unusual food allergy. I always presumed abraham or ishmael or jacob or moses or one of them mythical folk had a food allergy against pigs and said “you know what, if i started a religion about not eating pigs maybe i wouldn’t get the runs every time i went out to eat”
Yeah. Religion is well-known for its acceptance of logic 😆
Someone needs to explain to me why there’s ANY animal product in a paintball in the first place.
Paintballs are made of gelatin. Gelatin is often just collagen and collagen is basically connective tissue.
